Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
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