We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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