"it" just moved
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
