what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Randomize
