Swine flu. Run for my life!
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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