Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
