Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
i need some magic done to my vagina
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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