omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
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