I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
