no, he came in my armpit
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
How external is "for external use only"?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
