Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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