there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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