They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
