We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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