She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
