I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
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