road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
