the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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