everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
