somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
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