I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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