You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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