If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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