good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
