careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize