remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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