I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
someone threw a dead crab at me
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
A+ Viking dick
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
