in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
My legs feel like baby dolphins
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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