You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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