If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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