omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
