Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize