Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize