Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
