did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize