Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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