The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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