That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
