So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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