But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
