have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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