Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
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I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I have fence marks all over my body
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize