just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Randomize
