i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize