is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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