I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
