This is not my ceiling
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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