Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
