dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize