is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
